He Really Is Love

I don't know about you, but the "School of Hard Knocks" has made me one pretty tough chick. I am not a cryer. Well, I can't say that I'm completely immune, but it takes a lot.

Nine years ago, I knew something wasn't right when the then-owner of our house made it clear that the house would sell "as-is". I don't like being suspicious of others anymore than you do, but that school I mentioned above will do that to a person. I knew something wasn't right about this man's lack of disclosure, so I told my husband we should have the house inspected. After all, that had saved me a bundle when I didn't purchase that other house years earlier because it had failed its inspection. My kind, trusting husband, on the other hand, felt forking over an extra $300 or so was a waste of money.

We began having trouble about 6 months after moving into the house, and it has plagued us ever since. We've had the septic system pumped several times, and my dear husband has plunged, blown up tubes, snaked, and no-telling what else to try to get our plumbing into normal operation, all to no avail. Every few months or so, there we were again, with something stopped up.

Well, dear husband got his fill of it and decided we were handling this situation, once and for all. So I was sitting at the table paying bills last week while the plumbers trekked in and out with huge snakes, a super plunger, a camera, and their icky, poopy-germy workboots. (I'm SURE of it, because I could see those little buggers in my mind. EEUUUUW!)The problem turned out to be one that, lo and behold, my jack-of-all-trades husband would not be able to fix, so I had the privilege of hiring the plumbers to spend the following day with the me. When they told me the cost, I went into worry mode. We already had to replace our septic system, then there's the new roof we have to buy, and now another $850? I managed to hold it together until they left, then I lost it.

Fast forward a week, and I am praising God for getting us through yet another bind. It turns out that our insurance is covering the roof because it had hail damage. Because we are savers, we were able to pay the plumbing company the day of the service. We had planned to use our income tax refund to pay off some bills, but we'll be using it to replace that septic system. And, the strangest things have happened in the meantime. No one gives us money, but people have been giving us small amounts of money for services we don't even charge for.

As I pondered this, I thought about how God knew that I would sit at that table, crying and worrying over finances. Nothing surprises Him. The Word tells us not to worry because it solves nothing, but I don't know a person who hasn't done it. I began to think about how I would feel if one of my children was upset like that. I would set out to fix the problem (unless my remedy would cause him pain in the long run) and that's just what my Heavenly Father did for me. He had compassion for His child, and He fixed it.

I've been learning as much as I can from this situation, but, right now, I'm basking in God's love for me. It's so wonderful, and that's enough for today.

Take time to enjoy your blessings today. They're all around you.

Yes, You Have Them Too

Do you know someone whose gifts are so evident that yours seem to pale in comparison? You know, the kind of person you want to physically injure because she got all the talent? The kind of person who prompts the passive/aggressive voice of insecurity inside you to jump out and scream, "Lord, why does sheeeeee have all the gifts, all the looks, etc.?" Well, I'm not one of those people. In fact, I'm the one who has asked God that gut-gnawing question many times, and I've spent much of my life just trying to find one thing I actually do well.

So last fall, I started scrapbooking. I had collected sentimental items, paper, and embellishments for years, and it all finally came together when I opened that Cricut Christmas morning. (If you don't know what that is, you don't want to know now, because it brings new meaning to the word "addiction".) As soon as I laid eyes on that blessed box, I've been a new woman, a paper-cutting, bow-tying, glue-sticking, button-sewing, encouraging maniac who can't get enough. Someone can prick a finger, and I'm on it. I'm their man. Forget the wedding scrapbook. Cardmaking is IT.

First Corinthians 12:4 tells us: "Now there are different gifts, but the same Spirit." God has given every single one of us gifts. Sure, some are more obvious, and I believe an extroverted person's gifts will be seen much more quickly than those an introvert. Quiet people tend to stay "behind the scenes", and I've been thinking lately that keeping our gifts to ourselves isn't really a good thing. We do it for one of two reasons: 1) because we're too insecure to let others see them, or 2) because we're being humble.

Let's examine those reasons for a few seconds. If we believe we have a gift, but we're too insecure to put it out there, how can we use it to glorify God? And if we think God has given us a gift, but we don't let people see it, aren't we really hiding God's glory instead of being humble?

The key is found in Colossians 3:23: "Whatever you do, do it enthusiastically, as something done for the Lord and not for men." Everyone wants to make a difference, but why even concern ourselves with whether something is a gift or not? Isn't that more of a self-focus than a God-focus? (I'm preaching to the choir, folks.) If we enjoy doing it and believe we should be doing it, it's probably a gift, but more importantly, as long as we are doing it for God, then it's a gift to Him, and that's what really matters. After all, it came from Him, so wouldn't it be nice to use it to bless His heart?

How would you like to honor God with your gift today?

What's A Girl To Do?

My loved ones know that I struggle with insecurity. Really, do you know a woman who doesn't in this sexed-up, disposable culture? Most hide it well, but no, not me. My wounds overflow just as quickly in public as they do in private. God is working on me, but the whole issue has definitely gotten worse before it gets better. I mean, I have said some of the most immature, embarrassing, and insane things lately, and all on Facebook. Is that horrifying, or what? Never say never, Sister. It could happen to you too.

See, that's just the thing. Insecurity is insidious. It creeps in while we aren't watching, then at the most inopportune time, rears its nasty head. Like when that co-worker stands, posed for attention, sucking up to the clueless boss. Like when that dear friend seems to have it all, yet still has energy to spare. Like when that clique doesn't include you. Like when that Miranda Kerr look-a-like walks past. Like when your husband slips up and glances at another woman. (Oh, no, I didn't!) You get the message.

Psalm 139:14 says: "I will praise Thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth quite well."

Few, I believe, are so insecure that Scripture doesn't quickly cut through the pain, but we do exist. It takes more time for some than others, and that doesn't feel good, but it's okay. If you are one of those people, please allow me to elaborate on verse 14 a little. It doesn't say, "I will praise Thee; for I feel like I am fearfully and wonderfully made...." It says that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I love that it says His works are "marvelous", because if God made you, guess what? You are mah-ve-lous, Darling!

Dear friend, I encourage you to continue reading the remainder of the Psalm. It is chock full of God's rich love for YOU, and it would take many lines for me to explain the vastness of it. I don't know that I could do it justice anyway, but I would be so happy if you would allow God to speak to your wounds as you read it in your own time.

In fact, the Bible is filled with love for you. Love is who He is, and you are the object of His affection. I pray that you and I learn to stop searching this world and find our security in Him only, for He truly is the only One who can give it to us.

Father, thank You for the marvelous, distinquished person who is reading this. Thank You for showering her with Your love and acceptance. She was in Your heart long before she was ever conceived; wow! Thank You for helping her to stop judging herself and start loving herself so that she may be whole. Help her forgive those who have hurt her so that she may begin to break free from the bondage of unforgiveness. Most importantly, heal her mind of the wounds people have inflicted on her over the years so that she can freely accept Your love. Thank You, Father, that whom the Son sets free is free indeed!

The Old Red, White, and Blue

I never dreamed I'd marry a military man! My best friend in high school did just that, and I thought the whole culture was...well, frankly, weird. Way out there. Those people on base kept to themselves like some cult or something. I couldn't believe my outgoing, nutty friend had married into such a strange lifestyle. But then, many years later when I joined the commune (ha!), I realized that those "weird" folks are close because they are quickly bonded together by the trials, heartaches, insecurities, and, yes, joys of military life. They cling to one another because their military peers are the only ones who really understand, when it gets down to it.

So the old Red, White, and Blue means something very different to me now than it used to. I, not unlike you, saluted that flag in elementary school and pledged allegiance to it. I honored it because I was taught to honor it. I was always respectful, but I have to admit that it got pretty boring pretty fast. So it became a routine many days. Nothing more, nothing less.

I feel a deep-down respect for the American flag now because of the difficult sacrifices my family has made for it and because of the awful, heart-wrenching sacrifices others have made for it. I bawled like a baby at an Atlanta Braves game a few years ago because they had a fly-over (military jets zooming over the stadium real low) before the game and a patriotic fireworks display celebrating Independence Day afterward. I was shocked that I lost it like that over some silly fireworks, but it was much more than pyrotechnics to me. I had "become military". Wherever I am, I keep my eyes glued to the flag and my right hand firmly planted over my heart when our national anthem is being played, because it goes gut-level deep with me now. I have sacrificed for that flag, and it has sacrificed greatly for me. I love my husband, I love my family, I love those who have given their lives in service to our country, I love civilians, and I love that flag. I'm sorry it took marrying into the strange world of military life to fall in love with my country, but, as trying as this life can be, I'm honored to be able to say that I'm now a true patriot.

That flag might be battered, but she still waves, and I salute her. God bless America!

Remember

I came across this "remember" texticon a few minutes ago. The truth is, I've been feeling really down lately over some blended family issues. We have battled many things trying to "blend" into a family unit, and almost 8 years later, it's still the most trying and seemingly impossible thing I've ever undertaken.

As I was searching for a texticon to send someone, this one popped out at me. Boy, it was just what the Doctor ordered! I was reminded of the many times the Word says, "Remember...." Below are some Scriptures, and I've italicized the word "remember" in them.

"Search for the LORD and for His strength; seek His face always. Remember the wonderful works He has done, His wonders, and the judgments He has pronounced, you offspring of Israel His servant, Jacob's descendants--His chosen ones." 1 Chronicles 16:11-13

"After I made an inspection, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials, and the rest of the people, "Don't be afraid of them. Remember the great and awe-inspiring Lord, and fight for your countrymen, your sons and daughters, your wives and homes. When our enemies realized that we knew their scheme and that God had frustrated it, every one of us returned to his own work on the wall." Nehemiah 4:14-15

[One of the reasones the enemy wants to hinder us is so we can't do the work the Lord has set out for us. Notice verse 15 above.]

"what is man that You remember him, the son of man that You look after him? You made him little less than God and crowned him with glory and honor." Psalm 8:4-5

"Remember, LORD, Your compassion and Your faithful love, for they have existed from antiquity. Do not remember the sins of my youth or my acts of rebellion; in keeping with Your faithful love, remember me because of Your goodness, LORD." Psalm 25:6-7

"At night I remember my music; I meditate in my heart, and my spirit ponders. Will the Lord reject forever and never again show favor? Has His faithful love ceased forever? Is His promise at an end for all generations? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has He in anger withheld His compassion?" Selah. So I say, "It is my sorrow that the right hand of the Most High has changed." I will remember the LORD's works; yes, I will remember Your ancient wonders. I will reflect on all You have done and meditate on Your actions. God, Your way is holy. What god is great like God? You are the God who works wonders; You revealed Your strength among the peoples. With power You redeemed Your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph. Selah. The waters saw You, God. The waters saw You; they trembled. Even the depths shook. The clouds poured down water. The storm clouds thundered; Your arrows flashed back and forth. The sound of Your thunder was in the whirlwind; lightning lit up the world. The earth shook and quaked. Your way went through the sea, and Your path through the great waters, but Your footprints were unseen. You led Your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron." Psalm 77:6-20

"How often they rebelled against Him in the wilderness and grieved Him in the desert. They constantly tested God and provoked the Holy One of Israel. They did not remember His power shown on the day He redeemed them from the foe, when He performed His miraculous signs in Egypt and His marvels in the region of Zoan." Psalm 78:40-43

"Remember Your word to Your servant; You have given me hope through it. This is my comfort in my affliction: Your promise has given me life." Psalm 119: 49-50

"My spirit is weak within me; my heart is overcome with dismay. I remember the days of old; I meditate on all You have done; I reflect on the work of Your hands." Psalm 143:4-5

I haven't looked any of these "remember" words up in the concordance today, but I know that God's kind of remembering doesn't mean "to not forget", but it means "to choose to remember, to bring to mind". Just like how God remembers our sins no more. God knows everything. He doesn't forget. What is so awesome about Him in this area is that He chooses not to bring our sins to mind. I've never thought of it this way, but I guess it's kind of like how we have to cast down thoughts and feelings to live victoriously. It's all in the choice. Isn't it wonderful that God chose not to bring our sins to mind?

One thing I've always noticed about David is that, when he was down in the dumps, he chose to "remember" the awesome works of God. David was no dummy. He knew the key to tapping into that quiet spirit that only God can give us. This morning, I was very depressed. I am not much of a cryer over sad, personal situations, but I was really tearful this morning. Then I remembered...I got up and came straight to e-Sword (my computer Bible) to read some remembering Scriptures. Have I gotten much done since that time? No, but do I feel hopeful? Yes! How can I not when I remind myself of who God is and the mighty things He has done for me? His has held out His hand of salvation for me time and time again, and it is not too short for Him to handle this. I think of the verse in Jeremiah (?) where He says, "I am the LORD they God. Is anything too hard for Me?" This is small beans to my God!! As my friend Jennifer would say, "God's got it!"

"I am deeply depressed; therefore I remember You from the land of Jordan and the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep in the roar of Your waterfalls; all Your breakers and Your billows have swept over me. The LORD will send His faithful love by day; His song will be with me in the night--a prayer to the God of my life. I will say to God, my rock, 'Why have You forgotten me? Why must I go about in sorrow because of the enemy's oppression?' My adversaries taunt me, as if crushing my bones, while all day long they say to me, 'Where is your God?' Why am I so depressed? Why this turmoil within me? Put your hope in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God." Psalm 42:6-11

Blessed

I have always loved rain. Whether it comes in the form of a soft, calm rain; a hard, heavy rain; or a drenching downpour--I just love rain. But I have to tell you that the rain I love most is a downright tumultuous storm. There's something special in the beauty of swaying trees with leaves hanging on for dear life, lightning astonishing us as it finds its next target, rain seemingly falling sideways, puddles forming wherever they can find uneven ground, and (aah!) the sounds of thunder rolling and booming majesticallly. And I have this notion, whether true or utterly ridiculous, that it's raining in the spirit when it rains in the natural.

I remember praying for rain many times last summer because we were in the midst of what turned out to be quite a long drought. I knew God wasn't going to let everything die because that would pretty much be the end of us as well, but I did desire water for the parched trees and plants. When the rain finally came, other rain-lovers and I were not the only ones who welcomed it. There was much gratitude and rejoicing by everyone!

This morning as I drove to school, I began to thank God for all the rain we've had over the past week. (For those of you who are not near, it has rained everyday for the past several days.) Then I began to feel a little guilty about being thankful for rain when so many lives have been damaged or lost due to the tropical storm that started all this. So I continued to thank God for "our" rain, but I prayed for the people who have been hurt by it.

It is far too easy to go through life stuck in our own little worlds, temporarily blinded to the fact that others have pain too. I have been caught up in a trial lately, and I'm not saying it hasn't been difficult. But God is bigger. In fact, as my young son would say, "God is huger." Why do I magnify the trials when Psalm 34:3 says "O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt his name together"? The LORD the psalmist spoke of is THE self Existent or eternal; Jehovah. How can I account for taking my eyes off this IMMENSE LORD of mine when I know how big and wonderful and awesome He is? I want to be able to welcome storms in the spirit as much as I welcome natural storms, knowing that God will not abandon me, but instead will carry me through and strengthen me in the midst of them. I want this for you as well. Blessings to you!

Father, please help us to remember that You are our mighty God and that when You come, You come in power. We don't have to worry about the trials and situations in our lives as long as we keep our focus on You. Forgive me, Lord, for being so blinded by this trial that I haven't been able to see how powerful and awesome You are and how victorious I am in You. Teach us, Lord, and let Your Holy Spirit bring it to our remembrance when a storm hits. Help us to remember that, as Your children, we don't have to stand for those things the enemy throws at us. Let our shields of faith be brought forth, LORD, so that the fiery darts of the enemy will be quenched! Help us to build our armor up, Father, so that nothing can defeat us or cause us to feel defeated. Thank You, Mighty God. Hallelujah! In Jesus' name, Amen.

Trust

I was so tired last night that I wanted to go to bed instead of church. We had a wonderful, light-hearted service with lots of laughter, then we came home and hit the sack. Matthew and I had the boys in bed, and he was getting ready to crawl into our bed. Shockingly, I was already there. I usually ramble around the house an hour or so after the family's all tucked in.

Noah rushed into the room to get more night-night love from Mommy. (I'm hanging on to that word till the very last time he utters it, folks.) After we smooched our last kiss, he trotted over toward the door and collapsed into a heap on the floor, letting out a big "sgaaaagh" as he went down. There was a long pause, then just as I began to say, "Well, Honey, Noah has passed out again," he raised his little head to see why we hadn't noticed that we had a job to do. When he realized I hadn't forgotten about our little game, he lay back down and waited. Daddy walked over, picked him up, and began the short trip to Noah's bedroom. The snores quickly gave way to giggles as joy overtook him. Once Matthew tucked him in, he was down for the night.

On those nights when Matthew and I are too exhausted to put Noah to bed (and there are many), he uses this ploy to get his tuck-in. As our child, he is completely entitled to it, and by george, he's going to get it. I used to do it most nights, but since I happen to be female and he weighs over 60 pounds, I had to pass the baton.

As I lay in bed delighting in the moment, the thought hit me: That's how my Father wants me to be. He wants me to know that it's His joy to take care of me and give to me and just love on me. He wants me to have the trust of a child. He wants me to feel entitled to these things, not because I'm a selfish brat with what I call "entitlement syndrome", but because I'm His child and I'm precious to Him. And just maybe because He knows I'm going to love on Him right back.

"...because your Father delights to give you the kingdom" (Luke 12:32b).

"I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth is already bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth is already loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:19).

"I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore, I have continued to extend faithful love to you" (Jeremiah 31:3).

Father, help me to love on You by trusting You fully. In Jesus' name, Amen.